Ad banners. I guess you could make an argument about how banners are great or necessary or provide some sort of service. Whatever. I've known people who found 4 year old girls being critically injured to be funny or "a service to the human gene pool". So if you want, you can believe such things. You can also, if you choose, become a serial killer, the next hitler, or aspire to pilot jet liners into american buildings. That's all fine and dandy, and you're going to hell.
Ad banners didn't used to be so absolutely awful, but now there's a new breed poised to push me over the edge. Ad banners in shockwave. How wonderful. Since I don't want shockwave installed on my computer (there has never been and never will be anything cool created in shockwave -- this is strictly the province of people who enjoy picking up dates in bars named "The Purple Turtle" or "The Ridged Banana"), this means these ad banners annoy me with a constant barrage of messages:
"DO YOU WANT TO INSTALL SHOCKWAVE ON THIS COMPUTER? I KNOW I ASKED YOU FIVE SECONDS AGO BUT I THOUGHT YOU MIGHT HAVE CHANGED YOUR MIND!!!! NO? HOW ABOUT NOW? OH, OK, SORRY TO BOTHER YOU!!! BY THE WAY, WOULD YOU LIKE TO INSTALL SHOCKWAVE? I GOT MAIL!".
That's on my work computer, though. At home I do have shockwave installed. So these ad banners get to do things like annoy me by being animated, inane, and designed by people who would better serve humanity by getting skull fucked.
Yay! A camera that takes blurry pictures of the same empty room all day long! Look while we move this picture of a model around on the screen! Hurrah!
or
Yay! Look! We're a clan whose sole purpose is the abuse of illicit drugs! Look how our clever clan tag is also a drug reference! We're more clever than that tick latched onto my anus!
I'm so glad that now visiting otherwise worthwhile sites means I get to be visually assaulted by some moron's web equivalent of the family refridgerator.
The people responsible for this, whether their contribution was creating shockwave, or thinking of using shockwave in an ad banner, or designing that annoying shockwave ad banner, they all need to die. And not in some nice constitutionally approved non-cruel non-unusual manner either. No. They need to die horrible protracted deaths that Faces of Death would turn down for their next movie because it made the director have the worst nightmares of his life.
At first I was psyched. Mainly the Assault Rifle was the thing, but in general the maps I was seeing were just incredible. Big smile on my face last night, let me tell you.
So I'm playing some more this morning. In a heated battle with some Skaarj scum. I was right on the edge of a steep drop, and didn't have enough health to live through the fall. Took a lot of damage because I had so little room to dodge in. Then I misstep. Right over the edge. And standing there, hovering in the air, I waste the scumbag. Slowly I look down at my feet. I had this image of the Coyote in my head, and decided that the moment I saw empty air below my feet I would fall to my death. But no, I just stood there in empty space not falling. What's this?
So I loaded up another map -- I had to move the map to the correct directory, BTW, which is another (lesser) peeve. I loaded it up. DMDeck16. Ran to the lifts near the assault vest. Yup. No grids. What does this mean? This means that GT released a piece of software with a major bug in it. But not just any bug! This is a bug that Epic had already found the solution to! That's right! GT shipped buggy software that they could easily have fixed, and charged me money for it.
What assholes. You hear me GT? You are a bunch of corpse-fucking, rotten dick sucking, scabrous, lice infested, puss filled, unwiped assholes. I hate you. I hope you rot in hell for your unadulterated avarice. I am ashamed to be of the same species, and yet I'm not convinced we are the same species. Go crawl in a corner and die. No one will miss you.